Wednesday, August 19, 2009

25 Things Harder to Get Rid of Than Brett Favre

I saw this hilarious piece on NPR bearing the same name as this post and decided to give it a shot. The original bit was built on the continuing confusion over why Brett Farve just cannot stay retired. It seems he has unretired again. And by again, I mean as in THE SECOND TIME. What's this guys problem? Don't get me wrong, we all love some Favre, but dude, this isn't another Cher comeback tour, even that diva knows when to call a spade a spade.

So, in loving affection and bizarre speculation... here are my
25 Things Harder to Get Rid of Than Brett Favre.

1. Your tape collection
2. Ants in the kitchen
3. The tumbling ball of hair that seems to always appear no matter how often you sweep
4. The longing to smoke cigarettes again
5. The self-loathing that always piggybacks on a fat day or a bad hair cut
6. Your undying love of Guns n' Roses
7. The memory of your last Walk of Shame
8. A hangover
9. The feeling that you shouldn’t have let that one get away
10. Catholic guilt
11. Sweat stains in a white Tee-shirt
13. The things you wrote in your journal when you were young and stupid
14. Grey hair
15. Mismatched socks
16. A complicated relationship with technology that embraces both love and hate
17. A simple twist of fate
18. The desire to erase a bad day with booze
19. Those five pesky pounds
20. The sense you get when a spider on the wall escapes death and you just know it’s gonna end up in your sheets
21. Boredom at work
22. Your sweet tooth
23. Your addiction to NPR
24. The need to dance anytime you hear 80’s music
25. The belief that love does actually exists

For more on the original NPR post, see:

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